Conversations with my dog

I recently had this conversation.  A couple of times.......

'Dog':  "Why do you keep me caged up only on your property?"

Me: "Because I have to keep you safe and I love you!"

'Dog':  "But I want to run and be free and make friends and smell everything!!"

Me:  "If you ran free you might get hit by a car, or lost.  Your friends can visit you here, they know where you live, and as for some of the things you smell.......well, they just aren't good for you and it's my job to keep you safe!"

'Dog':  "But I'm big now.......I am a dog.......I am supposed to run free and smell everything.  It's the way God made me!"

Me:  "Well, that is true, but you are my dog, and I have to pay to get you out of the pound, and that's if you don't get hit by a car and die, and I wouldn't want to have to explain to God why I was so careless with your life.  Thank God I got you both fixed.  At least that's one thing I don't have to worry about with you dogs!!"

'Dog':  "But..............but.............but.................I'm not living a full life......I'm going to die alone.  All the other dogs' mothers' let THEM run free and smell everything!!"

Me:  "And I certainly hope their mother's have good reasons because God is pretty hard to fool!  Besides, someday you will be grown dog and you will have to make your own decisions.  I have to keep you safe long enough for that to happen.   It's my job to teach you how to make good ones even if I am not here to hit you upside the head with a wooden spoon and keep you on the right track.  It does seem to be taking kind of a long time, but we must persevere.  I know in my heart that you are a smart dog and you can figure this out."

'Dog':  "But..................but...........but..................."

As the 'dog' searches for another argument, I casually put some food out.  This distracts his sweet little male brain and the conversation is over.  Again.  

Until next time.

Ok, maybe it wasn't actually with a dog, maybe it was with a boy.  Or two.  But Jack and I have had this same conversation without the words.( I can tell by his eyes!)  Only with Jack, my actual dog, I know that as long as I let him in and give him food he would rather be there than anywhere else.  'Outside' ceases to be a concern to Jack unless he can see it.  

Boys, however, are pretty hard to fool.

Prayer For The Grieving

While we have had a wonderful winter so far weather-wise, we have lost a lot of people.  

Grieving is hard to go through.  It's hard to watch people you love go through.  This is probably the reason we try to hide it and pretend everything is fine.  But what I have been wondering lately is, does grieving, once begun, ever really end?  

Oh, sure, you get to the point where you stop crying all the time.  Eventually you can even bring yourself to plan your outfit's so that they coordinate again.  You have days where you are happy, then you remember your grief and feel immediately guilty.  It's not like you're suicidal or anything....... The list goes on of all the ways we convince ourselves that we are "over it".  Our hearts are not fooled.

Here is a prayer with a link and a few verses if you or someone you care about has been grieving.  We are entering the long, dark winter and I offer you the knowledge that you are not alone in your grief.  The sun will shine again, and you will know happiness.  It will mean even more to you now that you have known true grief.  This is what it is to get older.

http://www.beliefnet.com/Prayers/Protestant/Death/Comfort-The-Grieving.aspx

Comfort the Grieving

Father, I pray for (name one or more) and others in my circle of family and friends who are grieving...

They're hurting for many reasons, and I ask You to help them through this season of loss. I reach out to You, the Father of compassion and the Source of every comfort, asking You to touch them with Your unfailing love and kindness. Be their God who comforts them as they're going through their struggles, and bring them through the tough things ahead. Come alongside them in their pain, and strengthen them so they'll one day be able to help others who face the same struggles. (2 Corinthians 1:3–4; Psalm 33:22; 1 Samuel 20:14a)

You're close to people whose hearts are breaking, those who are discouraged and have given up hope. May You who see their troubles and grief respond when they cry out. (Psalm 34:18; 10:14a, 17)

When they're hurting, help them find their joy in You, for it's Your joy that will be their strength. Help them to trust You as their God of hope. Fill them with Your joy, peace, and hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Help them experience the love, joy, and peace that are the results of His life in them, no matter what they're going through. (Nehemiah 8:10b; Romans 15:13; Galatians 5:22)

May they sense Your presence in this hour of need. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Wandering......

OK, folks.  I may be paranoid.  Or crazy.  In any case,I am blaming the distraction of menopause for this but I have a nagging worry in the back of my mind that Alzheimer's may be starting.  If so, my plan is to get lost in my own family history and never come out.  

Maybe it's because I only drive the same routes, going the same places, every day.  Maybe it's because the automatic pilot has been handling these things for so long that I should just trust it and build a little bank of extra time into my schedule.  Maybe I got so good at multi-tasking in raising 4 children that certain things have worn a path so familiar that I have no choice but to follow, like a cow will come home at dark, or a dog will know when it's time for you to feed him even though everybody knows that a dog cannot possibly really know what time it is.

At any rate, the other day I was on my way to the Post Office.  I go there every day for work.  I take the same route every day.  I guess my brain doesn't even bother to work anymore on this (and many other familiar and oft traveled) routes every day.

My regular route to the Post Office was blocked by a train across the tracks, so instead of turning I go straight.  This puts me on the path that I follow home every day and noon and again directly after work.  About half way through my route home, I realize that I am headed home when I should be on my way to the Post Office.  This is not really a big deal but it has begun to happen a lot more often lately, and the distraction of menopause is leading to violent mood swings, against myself, mostly shouted loudly in derision of myself, in the privacy of my own car.

I believe that all of this is *normal*.

If you know better, tell my kids, since they are really the ones who will bear the brunt of it anyway.

If you do NOT know better, then please ignore me driving around (seemingly) aimlessly ( I have a plan, I just can't remember what it is every minute of every day!!), and/or the scary expressions on my face while I verbally abuse myself for being an idiot, ask myself what is wrong with me, and bite my own head off for having the audacity to ask me such things.

On days when my route is not varied, I sing loudly along with the songs on my favorite station that features 60's, 70's and early 80's.  Early because the awesome people who program this station do not classify RAP as music, in accordance with my own privately held opinion.  I get especially excited when Jackson 5 tunes get air time.  

And if you are wondering why you never see me anywhere but Wal Mart anymore?  It's because I rarely go anywhere but Wal Mart anymore except for work.  I have to go there or starve.  Everything else either dropped off my normal route or I am trying to get there, probably distracted by a variation in my normal route, and besides, can no longer behave myself in public due to violent mood swings.

And everything will work out just fine.  Shut up.