My mother's day got off to a real interesting start.
Without going into a lot of detail, I was at the end of my rope by 9 am. The reason that I was at the end of my rope is twofold and really nobody's fault but my own:
1) I have gotten really bad about going downstairs because the boys spend so much time there. The combination of dog, testosterone, and dust has become too much for me and I am going to have to seriously "hit it" on my next "high energy day". I pray it hits on a weekend because I only have a couple of vacation days left before July.
2) I have gotten slack in making the boys eat at the kitchen table. Please remember that these are children number 3 and 4, plus the fact that I spend most of my time these days wandering from room to room looking for stuff I can't find....Plus I was really tired the night before from blowing stuff to Kingdom Come all that day. More on that later.
My solution for not finding stuff upstairs is yelling downstairs and asking the boys where the lost stuff is, due to reason number 1 stated above.
So, it's Mother's Day, I am trying to fix a brunch so I can feed everybody before we embark on our afternoon plans, and I can't find any plates. No clean plates, no dirty plates. Now, I distinctly remember having used plates the night before to fix some kind of frozen food that neither of my grandmother's would have even considered "real food", but boys of the new millenium are thrilled to eat.
Naturally, I look around upstairs, and find no plates. So I yell down to the Grand Finale telling them to bring me the dirty dishes. They yell back that there aren't any dirty dishes down there. Right.
So I yell louder, (Did I mention what a beautiful day it was? ALL of our windows were open), asking where the plates are at. They yell back that they "don't know". Right.
Everybody knows that you only get 3 strikes, and the Grand Finale is no different. We all knew it was time for them to get real, but did they move before the third strike? No. They did not.
Which is why I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to any neighbors who heard some woman yelling (as if they wouldn't know it was me) that WHILE WE MAY ACTUALLY OCCASIONALLY "LOSE" A PAIR OF FINGER NAIL CLIPPERS, BOYS, OR A SCREW DRIVER, IT SIMPLY IS NOT POSSIBLE FOR US TO "LOSE" THE PLATES WE EAT OFF OF!!!" And then, just to seal the deal, because I was already wanting to just go back to bed, I threw in the old stand-by threat that always, ALWAYS works, because I could hear that the video game was still going and I knew in my heart that neither one of them had moved a muscle, "IF I DON'T HAVE ALL THE DIRTY DISHES UP HERE IN 2 MINUTES, I'M COMING DOWN THERE!!!"
This is the threat they hate more than anything. It never ends quickly or well when I go downstairs. Muaaahahahahahahahaha.
Immediate sounds of plates and silverware being gathered up. It sounded like they had even put the dirty dishes in the sink. This fact, sadly, and I probably shouldn't even admit this, made me proud. I know it's not much but it is progress.
At least I didn't have to actually go down there. That would have meant throwing the fit where you ask them if they were born in a barn and then I would have had to spend the entire day making them sweep and dust.
I thought it went much better this way. It was Mother's day, after all.......
Hope you had a good one, and if not good, at least memorable.
May 9, 2011
May 6, 2011
Guardian Angels
I am continually amazed at the "help" I get from what seems like the oddest places. I think everyone gets help like this, the trick is just to notice sometimes.
Whether you actually believe in Guardian Angels or not, I believe angels are everywhere. Not necessarily the kind with wings that shine with a light and speak for God, although that wouldn't really surprise me too much anymore. In fact, I have to wonder if I would consider that more or less odd than those people I saw the other night on TV with split tongues and plastic ....additions? things.....implanted under their skin to make them look like lizards and stuff. If you did that to someone else, what do you suppose the charge would be? I'm pretty sure it would land you in prison. But these people wanted to do that to themselves. Which is their right in this country. Ok, now I'm wandering again. Back to Angels, who, if I know God, will put one of those lizard-people in place to help me with something next week. He does that to me all the time. I'm pretty sure I'm currently supposed to be learning "humble". Don't ask me if that was a joke. It was and it wasn't. Just stay tuned and mark my words. It's happened to me MANY times. Now back to Angels.
It can be a random person holding a door for you when you are struggling to get into a store with a couple of infants. In seats. That weigh about 25 lbs. each. Maybe more. It always seems like more if it's raining. Or dark.
It can be the supporting squeeze on the shoulder from the person behind you (whom you may or may not know)when you are in line at Wal Mart and you have two toddlers who decide to have simultaneous melt downs and you are 4th in line for the checkout.
It can be someone who offers you a job, sets you up on a date that works out ( I freely admit this is more rare), or moves in next to you.
It can even be a sales clerk who intercedes between a mother and a teenage daughter and saves someones eyes from rolling right out of their joints.
You may not believe this, but it can even be someone who breaks your heart or betrays you in a way you think you will never get over.
Yes, it can!
Case in point: I have a real life Guardian Angel right here on earth. This person has been in my life for decades and has time and time again treated me like a child/sister/daughter in a way---and this is key for me with my pride and all----in which I have never been embarrassed or tried to resist. And might I add, they have never steered me wrong. Their concern has only ever been for my own best interests.
My angel is.... how can I put this.... used to being obeyed/in charge and has a way of taking control of situations, so that it seems as if it's the most natural thing in the world to.........obey. There are very few people in this world for whom I will fall into line. But this Angel makes falling into line feel like the most natural thing in the world. They have a gift.
So, today I mention to the Angel that I have signed up for a self defense course tomorrow and will happily spend the day blowing some stuff to Kingdom Come! The Angel immediately draws a pistol out of their pocket and asks if I want to take that. Yeah, you read that right. No self consciousness at all in just pulling out a gun at the drop of a hat. I have gotten used to this over the years. It used to make me want to shut doors and "hide the evidence", so to speak, and act in all manner of suspicious ways. But not now. I've come a long way, baby.
"No, it's too short, I need a longer stock so my wrists don't ache".
So the Angel says "Come by the house and I'll get you some more to pick from". I go to said house and am treated to a small collection of lovely firearms, (all legally registered), and a little practice session with the one I pick. 9mm all the way, Because I'm worth it. (I hope you are getting a kick out of my using phrases taken from products usually marketed to women here, because I think it's hilariously ironic. Cigarettes and hair color, respectively. If women listened to advertising they would indeed be lost, no? We lose a lot of the good ones that way.)
This gun is light, has smooth action, and doesn't make my wrists ache at all. Believe it or not, when you get older your wrists are going to betray you, honey. In all the worst ways. Mine have lost their strength and ache all the time to boot. WHICH is why it's important not to pick a gun too quickly. And to take Aleve every day.
Listen to me. You will need to know all this information sooner or later. It will happen to you. When it does, I expect you to be able to defend yourself and your children. There will be none of this standing around crying waiting to be rescued for my readers, understand? That scenario is not for us. If that is your plan, you need to get with the program or find yourself some other blog to read. Please. I cannot abide whining. There really is no reason for it and it is *very* unattractive. Don't do it. Just say no. (Not a product marketed to women, but an equally useless and expensive program that they used a woman to promote. Poor Nancy. She should have pointed a gun at their head and just said "no". Very politely, of course. You would be surprised how much easier it is be to be very polite when you are holding a gun.)
Be ready with the knowledge that you are equal to the task. Get a gun and get to know it. Know it so well you get used to feeling secure when you are lost in bad neighborhoods late at night after you took a wrong turn. Can you imagine this? It can be you. It will be me.
Wish me luck! Me and 99 other women are going to train to make the world a safer place today. I cannot wait!
This is just the latest way my Angel has guided me.
What about you? Have you seen any Angels lately?
Whether you actually believe in Guardian Angels or not, I believe angels are everywhere. Not necessarily the kind with wings that shine with a light and speak for God, although that wouldn't really surprise me too much anymore. In fact, I have to wonder if I would consider that more or less odd than those people I saw the other night on TV with split tongues and plastic ....additions? things.....implanted under their skin to make them look like lizards and stuff. If you did that to someone else, what do you suppose the charge would be? I'm pretty sure it would land you in prison. But these people wanted to do that to themselves. Which is their right in this country. Ok, now I'm wandering again. Back to Angels, who, if I know God, will put one of those lizard-people in place to help me with something next week. He does that to me all the time. I'm pretty sure I'm currently supposed to be learning "humble". Don't ask me if that was a joke. It was and it wasn't. Just stay tuned and mark my words. It's happened to me MANY times. Now back to Angels.
It can be a random person holding a door for you when you are struggling to get into a store with a couple of infants. In seats. That weigh about 25 lbs. each. Maybe more. It always seems like more if it's raining. Or dark.
It can be the supporting squeeze on the shoulder from the person behind you (whom you may or may not know)when you are in line at Wal Mart and you have two toddlers who decide to have simultaneous melt downs and you are 4th in line for the checkout.
It can be someone who offers you a job, sets you up on a date that works out ( I freely admit this is more rare), or moves in next to you.
It can even be a sales clerk who intercedes between a mother and a teenage daughter and saves someones eyes from rolling right out of their joints.
You may not believe this, but it can even be someone who breaks your heart or betrays you in a way you think you will never get over.
Yes, it can!
Case in point: I have a real life Guardian Angel right here on earth. This person has been in my life for decades and has time and time again treated me like a child/sister/daughter in a way---and this is key for me with my pride and all----in which I have never been embarrassed or tried to resist. And might I add, they have never steered me wrong. Their concern has only ever been for my own best interests.
My angel is.... how can I put this.... used to being obeyed/in charge and has a way of taking control of situations, so that it seems as if it's the most natural thing in the world to.........obey. There are very few people in this world for whom I will fall into line. But this Angel makes falling into line feel like the most natural thing in the world. They have a gift.
So, today I mention to the Angel that I have signed up for a self defense course tomorrow and will happily spend the day blowing some stuff to Kingdom Come! The Angel immediately draws a pistol out of their pocket and asks if I want to take that. Yeah, you read that right. No self consciousness at all in just pulling out a gun at the drop of a hat. I have gotten used to this over the years. It used to make me want to shut doors and "hide the evidence", so to speak, and act in all manner of suspicious ways. But not now. I've come a long way, baby.
"No, it's too short, I need a longer stock so my wrists don't ache".
So the Angel says "Come by the house and I'll get you some more to pick from". I go to said house and am treated to a small collection of lovely firearms, (all legally registered), and a little practice session with the one I pick. 9mm all the way, Because I'm worth it. (I hope you are getting a kick out of my using phrases taken from products usually marketed to women here, because I think it's hilariously ironic. Cigarettes and hair color, respectively. If women listened to advertising they would indeed be lost, no? We lose a lot of the good ones that way.)
This gun is light, has smooth action, and doesn't make my wrists ache at all. Believe it or not, when you get older your wrists are going to betray you, honey. In all the worst ways. Mine have lost their strength and ache all the time to boot. WHICH is why it's important not to pick a gun too quickly. And to take Aleve every day.
Listen to me. You will need to know all this information sooner or later. It will happen to you. When it does, I expect you to be able to defend yourself and your children. There will be none of this standing around crying waiting to be rescued for my readers, understand? That scenario is not for us. If that is your plan, you need to get with the program or find yourself some other blog to read. Please. I cannot abide whining. There really is no reason for it and it is *very* unattractive. Don't do it. Just say no. (Not a product marketed to women, but an equally useless and expensive program that they used a woman to promote. Poor Nancy. She should have pointed a gun at their head and just said "no". Very politely, of course. You would be surprised how much easier it is be to be very polite when you are holding a gun.)
Be ready with the knowledge that you are equal to the task. Get a gun and get to know it. Know it so well you get used to feeling secure when you are lost in bad neighborhoods late at night after you took a wrong turn. Can you imagine this? It can be you. It will be me.
Wish me luck! Me and 99 other women are going to train to make the world a safer place today. I cannot wait!
This is just the latest way my Angel has guided me.
What about you? Have you seen any Angels lately?
May 4, 2011
On Letting Go...
"Letting loved ones go". What a phrase. It actually sounds like you have any choice in the matter and you do it voluntarily. HA! It's more like you have your heart ripped out and shredded, then handed back to you and told to carry on the best you can because laying down and dying is not an option. Do I sound bitter????? If I do all I can say is I'm working on it. I can also testify that the "letting go" part? You actually do have to do that. Eventually. It happens gradually, but not without you noticing. Finally the guilt for living without them starts to wane, which in turn opens up some space for the guilt you will feel for having the nerve to continue living without them. Eventually you start to feel like maybe you made the right choice after all, but usually you qualify even that with the good that came to someone else because you kept on keeping on. Personally I told myself I had to do it for my kids. This "sacrifice" made it possible to stand the "guilt". But that's just the way it worked for me. I certainly am no expert, at least so far.
Once again, I am publishing a piece I can take no credit for originating. (After this I promise to get back to acutally putting myself out there). It was sent to me as an email after my mother passed, and it gave me more comfort than I could ever express in words of my own. Death is a part of life, the price we pay to get in, so to speak, always with us and yet often not discussed. This helped me to see the bigger picture, and to view what felt like "the complete and total end" as "just one stop on a long journey". I think this is a lot closer to the truth. I also believe most people believe in life after death, but at the time that does little to relieve your pain.
This poem is such a beautiful way to picture it. It brought me peace and I hope if you need it now or if you ever do, you can remember where to find it. Whatever your beliefs, I hope they include your lost one's loved ones joyously receiving and welcoming them because I am positive that is exactly what happens. No, I have science(!) to back this up either. If you haven't figured it out yet, life for me is largely a matter of faith. And for that I thank God at least one time each day. I wish you peace and strength in your dark times, whenever they may happen.
Once again, I am publishing a piece I can take no credit for originating. (After this I promise to get back to acutally putting myself out there). It was sent to me as an email after my mother passed, and it gave me more comfort than I could ever express in words of my own. Death is a part of life, the price we pay to get in, so to speak, always with us and yet often not discussed. This helped me to see the bigger picture, and to view what felt like "the complete and total end" as "just one stop on a long journey". I think this is a lot closer to the truth. I also believe most people believe in life after death, but at the time that does little to relieve your pain.
This poem is such a beautiful way to picture it. It brought me peace and I hope if you need it now or if you ever do, you can remember where to find it. Whatever your beliefs, I hope they include your lost one's loved ones joyously receiving and welcoming them because I am positive that is exactly what happens. No, I have science(!) to back this up either. If you haven't figured it out yet, life for me is largely a matter of faith. And for that I thank God at least one time each day. I wish you peace and strength in your dark times, whenever they may happen.
I am standing upon the seashore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until at length she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other. Then someone at my side says: “There, she is gone!”
”Gone where?”
Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast and hull and spar as she was when she left my side and she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her. And just at the moment when someone at my side says: “There, she is gone!” there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout: ‘Here she comes!”
And that is dying.
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